Seriously???

I just rang the school transport service for a replacement bus pass for Master Jacob.

Brrring Brrring, Brrring, Brrring

Receptionist: Hello, School Transport Service

Mrs T: Good morning, I need a replacement school bus pass for my son.

Receptionist: Is he of school age?

Mrs T (in her head) No, he's a F***** pensioner.

Mrs T (out loud) Yes.

I now know why I can't get a job - I am too clever.