Thursday, January 21, 2016

A Second Night of Insomnia

I am on my second night of insomnia in a row. Now long term readers will know that I go in phases with my insomnia and have frequently posted in the middle of the night. (When I've got fed up reading The Daily Mail.) However, my insomnia hasn't been too bad for a while but the last two nights it has come back with a vengeance and tonight I also can't stop sneezing for no apparent reason and instead of reading The Daily Mail I have been forced to run numerous virus checks on my PC because of a potential threat. As we say in the UK:

It never rains but it pours.

So no doubt tomorrow I will get run over by a bus.

I just pray to God that this perimenopausal phase I am in doesn't prevent me from forgetting to change my knickers as if I am going to die, I want to die wearing clean undies.

Mind you, if I get splattered by a bus it probably wouldn't matter too much: I guess it would be kinda messy.

Well, that's a happy thought for 4 am in the morning. Truly. I don't have to worry now if, in my mad perimenopausal state, I forget to change my knickers and get run over by a bus. You see you can find a positive side of things if you want to.

Now you may be wondering what I have been doing lately. I have been wondering this myself. The life of a Housewife Extraordinaire/tennis mum/author is somewhat peculiar. This has all been complicated by the fact that the good Mr T has been out of work since last May which has rather interrupted my daily routines of doing just what the hell I like.

If there is a God, I pray he releases me from the agony of the Good Mr T invading my kitchen. A job for him too would be pretty good but, most importantly, I need him the hell out of my kitchen. In the last two days he has sliced up his finger with a one of those razor sharp vegetable slicers and (worse) served up LIVER to the kids.

They were not impressed. Luckily, I avoided the liver as I am on a diet so eating my own concoctions. (Which don't involve liver in way, shape or form.)

In fact, my diet is a particularly awewsome one which allows me to have chocolate when stressed.

So not much of  a diet really. But hey it's the thought that counts!

So what news do I have apart from the one that I am being driven close to insanity. Well, I am editing a book at the moment. It is my first "official" edit. Obviously, my edit won't include proofreading as most of you will know that where grammar is concerned (especially on this blog) it is not a top priority. Quite bizarrely, having done a few beta reads (that sort of morphed into edits) I think editing is something I am really rather good at. (Which makes a change.) What's more, this book I am editing is really rather unique. In all likelihood, it's going to be totally different to anything you've read before. It is going to be very interesting indeed to see the reaction to it.

Anyway, it's 5 am now so I am going to have some breakfast and see if I can lull myself into sleep with some carbs. If I am lucky I won't dream about the no 72 bus.

Sunday, January 3, 2016

New Year, New Me

Thank goodness last year is over. It was not one of my best. (And that's putting it mildly.) I've also a feeling that the rotten phase I'm in at the moment has not yet reached its nadir. Humph. However, as you know, I don't like to whinge too much so instead of an in-depth, knee-deep whinge I shall simply sum up my present state of mind and my 2015 with the picture below.

Okay so as 2015 didn't go all that well for me, I think it's important I start 2016 in a positive mindset.

So my positive mindset begins with the news my short story Fantasia is free (yes FREE!) on Amazon Kindle until the 6th January and, at the time of posting this blog, it is 379 in the US Kindle free charts and no 1 in two children's categories. They are only small categories but, nevertheless, I am pretty pleased as Fantasia is only a short unillustrated story. You can pick up a free copy HERE.

Right, so my diet starts tomorrow. The boys are back at school on Tuesday when I also start my new yoga class.

Roll on 2016.

My Nominees for the US and UK Elections and Other Waffle

It's the early hours of the morning, and I have had a large gin... Late-night alcohol is always a good recipe for writing gibberish. And...