Tuesday, January 9, 2018

New Year Update

I have had a number of requests from different sources to update my blog so, finally, here I am.

Firstly, I want to thank all those of you who have continued to pop over here over the course of the last year. It has been heartening to see that my blog has not been entirely abandoned and that people still want to read my musings or check on my wellbeing. Thank you all very much.

So, the last year has not been easy. There have been many times I've wanted to let off steam on my blog. However, I decided that for the moment, at least, I will not directly write about the traumas I
have been going through. I am not yet divorced, primarily because my life has been so chaotic with endless problems arising that I have not yet completed all the paperwork. But I shall be granted a divorce of that there is no doubt. The terms will either be settled in mediation or, if need be, in court.

And I will not be signing my husband's small print clauses to silence my voice. That might mean going to court and stripping away my last few assets. But so be it. I had a very frugal upbringing and can do without and I am a lot tougher than people think. I'm not going to be sticking my head in the oven or blowing my brains over a divorce or being broke - a world shortage of chocolate maybe. But a divorce? No.

So the good news is that I still I have a sense of humour and this is what has kept me going alongside the support of my many friends. I have some awesome friends. I still find time to laugh daily and slowly I am healing.

What's more, I even got asked on a date last week! I declined though. I have enough crap going on
without dealing with date dilemmas and men who think with their penises rather than their brains. (I might have to revisit this subject in length at some point.)

I would be lying though if I denied the fact that I have shed a lot of tears over the last year but these
are not tears over the end of my relationship they are tears of frustration, anger and sadness at the problems I have been left to deal with and the fallout that has directly my children's future and wellbeing. The tears intensify every time my husband's family try to manoeuvre my children away from me. However, this manoeuvring hasn't worked so far and it won't because I am my children's rock and they know I would lay down my life for them.

On the work front, I have three jobs, lost one through the company going into receivership and am shortly to lose the third through redundancy. I have had a tonne of other crap to deal with which I shan’t even bother to write about for fear of this blog becoming an essay.

However, here I am. I am alive, facing my struggles head-on and doing the best I can in very trying circumstances. I am sad to be leaving my current job as it has been a source of great pleasure and friendship in a difficult time but life goes on and hopefully a new adventure awaits me.

On a different note, as you can see my blog appareance has started to change as I am thinking about
writing again. I think it will be sporadic at first but expect to see me back here more regularly in the coming months.

And we shall have some fun! Laughter is always the best medicine. Finding humour in the small things around me is probably what’s saved me in the last few years.

And I don’t intend to stop laughing until I stop breathing.


  1. Having witnessed and sometimes hand held a relative through a messy divorce that ended in court because the partner wouldn't mediate I can only sympathise with what you are going through. But there is light at the end of the tunnel even if it seems a long way off right now. Let's hope 2018 is a year of new beginnings for you and definitely not the end of your writing.

    1. Thanks Wendy. I like positive thinking:) This last year has been a uphill struggle, in every way. I am exhausted in every way, physically, emotionally. I am not going to cave in though. No way, I will not give my husband and his family the satisfaction.

  2. I am sorry to read of your troubles. But you have a good attitude which is more important than problems. A world shortage of chocolate should never be jested about. I'll have to have a cup of cocoa to calm down.

    The good part of the divorce is that in a year or two, you will feel so fortunate to have your freedom. Shame on his family about trying to get the children to take sides. Shame Shame Shame.

    1. I keep myself going Ann by imagining my future free of my current stresses. A desk overlooking the countryside, a completed novel on my laptop, my boys around the table with me where they belong. My husband has stripped me of everything except our home (and that will come too eventually). He cannot strip me of my imagination though and my imagination and humour will see me through.

  3. Hold on and keep trudging, Jane. I am sure you are going to have a great 2018 with lots of good surprises. Love XOXO

    1. Thanks Jeanie:) 2018 can’t be much worse than 2017 so it can only get better!


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