Mrs T: Master Jacob, would you please unload the dishwasher and tidy the kitchen whilst I'm out?
Master Jacob: What is this? Nazis Germany?
Where have I gone wrong, readers? Where?
On another matter entirely, I have a ticket to go to the London Book Fair and if I feel it's safe to leave the Young Masters with an unstacked dishwasher I may leave them to their own devices. I may not have a home to come back to but it may be a risk worth taking.
Now I have decided that, if I get off my sorry arse, and go to the Book Fair later today I shall keep my eye out for:
1) A healthy young male (heterosexual) literary agent, preferably under 35, with a sense of humour. It would also be an advantage if he did not wear a chequered waistcoat.
Okay that's not going to happen.
2) A healthy young male (heterosexual) publisher, preferably under 35, with a sense of humour who does not wear a chequered waistcoat and glasses.
Hmm...even more unlikely.
3) A healthy young male (heterosexual) author, preferably under 35, with a sense of humour, who does not wear a waistcoat, glasses and who does not write science fiction.
Hmm....no *ucking chance.
Okay, I think I need to look for something more obtainable.
I know - I'll look for one of those stands where you get a free chocolate-chip cookie with the useless glossy magazine giveaway. Oh and the restroom.
|The ultimate dilemma for any male literary agent. Which waistcoat?