The truth is I'm depressed because I've received an email from Amazon trying to sell me a matching set of placements and coasters. Now this is depressing because, frankly, I'm not looking like a very dynamic person if all they can try and seduce me with is placemats and coasters. How about sending me an email for a super-charged vibrator or a sit-on lawn mower? Or maybe a helicopter flight or a massive chainsaw? Cos you know, I like to consider myself still relatively lively for 48 years old. There's still some life in ol' Mrs T yet. I'm not sitting in front of my fire with my feet ensconced in a foot warmer, wrapped in a waffle dressing gown and studying the Sunday supplements for bargain hearing aids.
Not just yet anyway.
So, if getting an email trying to entice me to buy placemats and coasters wasn't bad enough - the pictures on the placemats they wanted me to buy was even more of a kick in the teeth.
It was artwork by the once subversive street artist Banksy.
Who is now selling his art for use on placemats and coasters. Gez. Talk about being commercial and conventional. I mean one has to assume Banksy knew what was going to happen to it - or at least have a very good idea.
Ah well, I suppose age makes people lose their ideals. Still selling out for placemats is sinking pretty low.
As for me? At the moment, I'm still after a ******* huge chainsaw but I guess my time will come too. Those bed socks get more appealing every winter.
|Everyone can have fun with a chainsaw. Even a business geek. I want to see if this one is going to try and cut his hair.