Shall I go on? It's a pitiful tale. We could all be suicidal by the end of it.
Okay, I won't elaborate further.
Well not much.
Cripes, it's just well I don't live in Africa isn't it? I'd be really fed up then. Hmm...one must try to think positively. There is always someone worse off than yourself.
Think Kim Kardashain's arse, Mrs Turley. It's just huge, isn't it? Yeah, I know people say it's sexy big but they're not fooling me. I have a big arse. I know the truth.
Blimey, I sound like a depressed writer. I am going to self diagnose myself with bi-polar.
Luckily, writing is very therapeutic for me. I can let out a whole stream of
So now, where was I going with this? Oh yes, depressed writers. That's not me. I'm just an annoyed writer. (Verging on mania.) All will be good when I hear some nice happy news like the Duchess of Cambridge has given birth to triplets.
However, if I hear/read any more new about how many millions J K Rowling is going to make out of her book published under her leaked pseudonym I am going to listen to a Leonard Cohen album and gorge myself to death.