tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post7790022525636863653..comments2024-02-06T12:09:18.943+00:00Comments on The Witty Ways of a Wayward Woman: Irons, Costumes and a load of rubbish.Jane Turleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01441332018679664175noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-18560558269097425582008-03-19T04:13:00.000+00:002008-03-19T04:13:00.000+00:00Well hello Andrew The Male Housewife. Is your PC f...Well hello Andrew The Male Housewife. Is your PC fixed? As you can see Mrs T is still suffering from her insomnia! I was just writing to the Lawn Tennis Asociation telling them what a dead loss (that's my polite language) they are when your message popped up -a welcome relief!<BR/><BR/>I'm afraid to say the last two years have not been so kind as you suggest Andrew! Cellulite and subcutaneous fat certainly ring a bell! I've escaped the haemorrhoids and varicose veins so far but I ain't telling on the other! (Of course sneezing is a real problem too;just as well I'm not allergic to pollen.) <BR/>I'm sure you will have some very thoughtful and observant comments to make on the lovely subject of househusbandry in due course and I'm positive some of my readers would simply love to hear about dishclothes and bottom wiping from a male perspective!Jane Turleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01441332018679664175noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-76494095714775370292008-03-19T03:28:00.000+00:002008-03-19T03:28:00.000+00:00Hey Jane that photo of you isn't terrible at all. ...Hey Jane that photo of you isn't terrible at all. With all those self deprecating comments I was expecting a loathsome looking thing with the body of Matt Lucas and the head of Peter Lorre AND Matt Lucas. With you bending forward like that...wait look, next to that shrub, it's Remington Steeleing up behind you. <BR/>Unless, of course, things - cellulite, subcutaneous fat, haemorrhoids, vaginal looseness, varicose veins - have taken a serious hold over the past two years.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-64223447302134153522008-03-12T14:26:00.000+00:002008-03-12T14:26:00.000+00:00Now I don't like guns but I know what you mean ......Now I don't like guns but I know what you mean ... Just think what a mad housewife with an AK47 would be like. People wanting you to make elaborate costumes for your children when you already have about 800 things to do, would quake in their boots. People trying to dump paperwork on you would be literally blown away. Boy racers would get short shrift. Boy, would I make enemies fast! I think I'd better go and lie down in a darkened room until 3 pm.fordfocusmomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04038038065550719517noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-6310042825648945262008-03-11T23:48:00.000+00:002008-03-11T23:48:00.000+00:00Goldfinger eh? Using the cheap paper these days t...Goldfinger eh? Using the cheap paper these days then? Some things are worth spending the little extra on you know.<BR/><BR/>I should also warn you that I am armed with kitten poop. The smell from that armed with the underpants of master Samuel would make us a force to be reckoned with. We could rule the woooooorld!!!Kevhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06255906764540903051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-59116989980266013672008-03-11T11:05:00.000+00:002008-03-11T11:05:00.000+00:00Mewie; somehow I don't think Mr T would like to ha...Mewie; somehow I don't think Mr T would like to have his fetish for ironing his pants illustrated to the whole world. However, it is possible that I will soon be posting a picture of his new iron... ho, ho, ho....<BR/><BR/>Bond, Sy Bond.<BR/><BR/>Now I didn't want to tell you Sy because it's an official secret... but I am On Her Majesty's Secret Service... which means I have access to the most powerful and deadly weapon known to man...which is, of course, Master Samuel's underpants...<BR/><BR/>Oh by the way Mr Turley says I have a Goldfinger... but I'm not one to brag...<BR/><BR/>Ah Floogie,<BR/><BR/>What good taste you have and of course a man CAN appreciate another man's looks and talents with out being bitter and twisted. Obviously, I won't mention any names but I feel the need to give a big Sy of regret for him...<BR/><BR/>You ran away with your teddy bear? Oh, how sweet! (Master Benedict is obviously a lot smarter though as he had made some preparations.) Master Bebedict is also smarter than Master Jacob who just left in his shorts and T-shirt one day...<BR/><BR/>Am I doing something wrong? I thought I was the perfect mother and housewife.....Jane Turleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01441332018679664175noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-2940834931403372482008-03-11T10:43:00.000+00:002008-03-11T10:43:00.000+00:00Sue amd Mrs A... What is wrong with you? Legolas l...Sue amd Mrs A... What is wrong with you? Legolas looks like a fairy! (I mean that in an Elfish way) And he way, way too young. Now I know youth IS very, very attractive and I'm not denying the fact that I may have cast my eye over some young gentlemen of my acquaintenance but a woman also needs an EXPERIENCED man who has a large gun which he can withdraw at any moment. Wallets too are very important and I am sure Pierce's Wallet is exceptionally huge. Legolas is but a boy which is why he is looking for the One Lego Brick to build his castle....<BR/><BR/>Mrs A; no I could not bring myself to look at that vile, vile woman... A woman who likes cooking AND football... why she is a traitor to womankind...<BR/><BR/>Oh Mrs A as I know you are exceedingly clever what does Onedia's cryptic comment mean? My poor little brain can not work it out... or indeed anyone if you know the answer please do tell...Jane Turleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01441332018679664175noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-66030838311867504552008-03-10T22:29:00.000+00:002008-03-10T22:29:00.000+00:00Pierce is just so obvious. Legolas on the othe han...Pierce is just so obvious. Legolas on the othe hand, is much more intriguing. Being a 6 foot blond elf probably helps the air of mystery...<BR/><BR/>Did you watch Delia? Our TV has been in mortal danger from missile attack...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-28558461358885809512008-03-08T16:10:00.000+00:002008-03-08T16:10:00.000+00:00Purely in a manly sort of way, with not a hint of...Purely in a manly sort of way, with not a hint of Homosexuality, Pierce wins hands down for me.<BR/><BR/>The difference? He's a man whilst Lego land or whatever his name is, is a boy. Also, Mrs Floog adores Pierce so I have to be careful in case she reads this.....<BR/><BR/>The running away bit reminded me of when I was five and left home with my cowboy outfit on, clutching my teddy bear. I made it all the way to the end of the street before getting home sick!SOUL AFLAMEhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01573533081507593697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-72509156191322083722008-03-07T19:08:00.000+00:002008-03-07T19:08:00.000+00:00A 6'6 giant ironing his huge pants with a girlie p...A 6'6 giant ironing his huge pants with a girlie pink iron... that's hilarious. Please, please take a picture! :PAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-88582189345360430932008-03-07T17:26:00.000+00:002008-03-07T17:26:00.000+00:00This post is for your eyes only...I smell all fish...This post is for your eyes only...<BR/><BR/>I smell all fishy. I look a bit beaten up. I checked the mirror, and then checked the image again. STILL better looking. I feel kinda bad that I can be this bad while still being so good. <BR/><BR/>I once walked past a row of women at a taxi rank and they all fainted. True story. Yeah OK, so I had not showered for a few days that time. But you know, if I hold on to the idea it was my looks and not the festering smell, I can die another day. I mean come on. Nobody does it better. I did ask the Dr but he said No. I said I wasn't happy with his opinion but he said "Hey. live and let die." Yeah sure. So I kicked him in the thunderballs. It is like I had a view to a kill, but really. Tomorrow never dies. And all the time I have scared the living daylights out of him, I can live in a quantum of solace at the casino royale.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-44215793938821828772008-03-07T14:50:00.000+00:002008-03-07T14:50:00.000+00:00I'm with Onedia there-much prefer Legolas. Mr. Br...I'm with Onedia there-much prefer Legolas. Mr. Brosnan--good-looking though he maybe--seems more the 'all brawn, no brain' type. me I prefer the brainy types (I know I fail you there Mrs. T)<BR/>Oh and, the punishment meted out to Mater Benedict was surely more than the crime deserved--shut in his room till George Bush had passed the MENSA(my sides are hurting). No wonder he tried to make an escape!hillgrandmomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01805698959846687562noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-20568071044337536092008-03-07T09:55:00.000+00:002008-03-07T09:55:00.000+00:00Right, I've put my pyschoanalyst's hat on ready to...Right, I've put my pyschoanalyst's hat on ready to interpret the reactions of my readers to the lovely Pierce;<BR/><BR/>Sy; YOU MIXED UP CRAZY GUY! Do you think any man on earth could compare with the lovely Pierce???? Have you no shame man...to compare yourself to such a God-like being who wealds his PPK as if he were parting The Red Sea. I see no hope for you Sy; you must take out your semi fired haddock AND some wet mackeral and beat yourself senseless until such time as you fall to your knees (and smell rather badly) proclaiming your obedience and loyalty to The Good Looking One.<BR/><BR/>Tamera; this is a perfectly natural reaction to such a prime specimen of the male species. Pat your self on the back and congratulate yourself you are totally normal. (Oh.. might be a good idea to change the knickers too.)Jane Turleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01441332018679664175noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-73909004181376781612008-03-07T02:59:00.000+00:002008-03-07T02:59:00.000+00:00Ooooo! I like your deck of images much better than...Ooooo! I like your deck of images much better than mine...<BR/><BR/>What do I see....hmmmmmm<BR/>mmmmmmmmmmmmm....<BR/>Oh my. Is it warm in here, or is it just my menopause acting up? <BR/>I believe I need a glass of ice water.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-88042418725893758832008-03-07T01:51:00.000+00:002008-03-07T01:51:00.000+00:00OK. I looked at the picture, and all I really tho...OK. I looked at the picture, and all I really thought was:<BR/><BR/>"Man who wishes he was as good looking as I am, and even half as popular with the ladies."<BR/><BR/>Is that a true reflection of how I should be thinking? Or should I now beat myself over the head with a semi fried haddock until I realise this is maybe not the case. I am WAY better then that and should not put myself down to that level.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4735085699153339257.post-54148647702917746132008-03-06T21:45:00.000+00:002008-03-06T21:45:00.000+00:00Nope, no idea. Reminds me of quadratic equations a...Nope, no idea. Reminds me of quadratic equations and I couldn't do those either. Now when Master Samuel is passing I'll ask him. He won't know either but I always enjoy making him feel stupid.(It's a mother thing!)<BR/><BR/>Yep, he just passed and he didn't know...Jane Turleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01441332018679664175noreply@blogger.com